An Ugly Secret: Helping Loved Ones Escape Domestic Abuse
Emotions can run high during an argument in the home and things can quickly escalate into an aggressive situation.
How to know if you’re in a safe environment and when it’s time to get help.
Victims may not know they’re in an abusive relationship until something unfortunate happens.
And even so, denial often seeps in.
When it comes to relationships, doctors say sometimes it’s hard to spot red flags when they come up.
“If I’m feeling I can’t be the best me with my partner then maybe there’s something wrong in that situation,” says Dr. Christopher Johnson of Rape and Abuse Crisis Center.
Doctor Johnson says that often times when there is domestic violence at home, it’s one person’s need to control another person.
He says that victims discover in order to stay safe, they often sacrifice themselves and attempt not to step out of line.
But there is something you can do to help.
“If their behavior has changed. If they exhibit a fear of response. If they appear to feel trapped. If they are more isolated, that might be a warning sign that something is going on,” says Dr. Brian K. Moe of Family Institute.
If signs are not caught in the early stages, it will make things more difficult for the victim to leave.
Johnson explains, “The more that the person being controlled or being isolated starts to step outside, whatever expectations an abuser might have, that’s when you see the violence escalate.”
When there’s violence, it’s advised to get the police and court involved.
Police say domestic calls are very broad and happen often.
But because the party usually knows each other, the situation can be unpredictable.
“That can lead to where an officer that is called to an emergency situation that they’re unaware of, if you don’t take these precautions in advance, they can be very dangerous,” says Lt. Tory Jacobson of Moorhead Police.
Law enforcement is trained to deal with these circumstances but can’t perform their job if the victim won’t let them intervene.
Too often, experts say, the victim cannot escape the vicious cycle.
If you are questioning your safety in a relationship, helplines are available and you do not have to give your name.
Here is a list of helplines:
24 HOUR CRISIS PHONE LINE
701-293-7273 or 1-800-344-7273
701-282-8510
1?800?799?7233
